How To Get Your Spouse On Board With Finances
Are you a planner? Are you a budgeter? You want to get out of debt but your better half says otherwise. Are you the one who has been trying to get your spouse on board with your finances but no luck? You’ve come to the right place. I’ll show you how.
My husband and I have been married for over 20 years. We were both very young then and didn’t care much about our finances as a family. Bills got paid. Everything was fine. Life moved forward. Repeat.
Everything changed when our baby arrived. We talked more about money and finally had specific financial goals. I learned early on as a young couple that regularly talking with each other about money issues was the key to our marriage.
I love talking about money but my husband does not. Though, I’m not perfect. I spend money sometimes, but one thing I’m good at is having an open and honest dialogue about money with my husband. Talking to your spouse about money problems may not be at the top of your to-do list, but it’s the most important aspect of your marriage.
One Team One Purpose
Whether you’re in a relationship, engaged, or married, it’s a good idea to start discussing your financial situation and goals right from the start.
You and your partner are a team. Money can be a source of problems in any relationship so it’s a good idea that you want to be on the same page with your spouse. Find out what each other’s goals are, determine a family goal and address any issue as early as possible. Don’t try to do every financial thing alone. A marriage takes two. The two must become one for your journey to be a financial success. Your life together will be much more enjoyable if you share the same path.
Family money talk covers a wide variety of topics including budgeting, debt, saving, or retirement planning. Everything starts with budgeting and this should be the first one you start talking to your spouse about. Budgeting is the foundation of financial success. Once you and your spouse understand a family budget. Debt payoff and savings will fall into place.
Setting a budget is important but not always welcomed by every member of your household. To some, a budget may feel a bit restrictive and not make much sense. If you are the one that is doing the bill paying and balancing of finances each and every month, it’s imperative for you to set a budget and communicate it with your spouse. If you expect your spouse to understand, accept and be on board with the budget and financial aspect for your household, you must take the time to explain why there is a reason for a budget in the first place.
5 Simple Ways to Get Your Spouse on Board with Finances
1. Have a conversation about your goals as a couple
If you think that you need to be saving and spending money one way, and your spouse feels differently, then it’s time to sit down and have a conversation about what is going to be best for the both of you. The sooner that you can start that open dialogue about money, the better that your outcome will be.
2. Make it easy and break the numbers down
Write down all the expenses that are paid out each and every month. Honestly, your spouse may not have any idea just how much money your household spends each and every month on just the required bills. In their mind, all they know is that the bills get paid and life keeps moving forward. Write down the required, no-excuse bills that have to get paid each and every month and then compare that to the money that you have coming in. Breaking it down into a simple formula is a great way to help get your spouse on board with your finances.
3. Let them take over the financial aspect for the family for a while
If they just don’t get it, why not let them take over paying the bills and managing the finances for a period of time? It will give them a taste of how it feels to have to budget everything each and every month and may give them a better appreciation of just how hard managing the finances for the family can truly be.
4. Talk about ways that you can save up to do something special for just the two of you
If your spouse is giving a bit of grief when talking about finances, give them a goal of something to work towards. Maybe there is a trip or something fun that the two of you have been wanting to do for quite some time…If that is so, then planning a way to make it happen should be a priority! Talk to your spouse about cutting down on some of those frivolous spending ways and saving up that money instead for an epic trip. Simple things like packing your lunch from home and not buying coffee each and every morning can add up to some really great savings that can go towards the vacation of your dreams!
5. Think about value, NOT numbers
Money is a sensitive subject to talk about. Especially if you’re in debt or your spouse is a spender. It’s not a good idea to play the blame game and start pointing fingers. Think about value, forget the past, and focus on the future. Change the way you approach talking about money by focusing on what your spouse can change. Try using phrases like “Would you like to go to Europe next Summer if we can just save $$ a month?” or “Let’s work together so we can get out of debt faster” or “Would it be amazing if we get rid of our debt, save half or our income, and retire 10 years sooner?”.
When communicating with your spouse about being on board with the finances, keep in mind that there may be a bit of resistance at first. It’s common happening. Talking to one another in a respectful manner is key when trying to get on the same page about finances. The more quickly that you both can agree on a short-term and a long-term goal, the better! Use your combined intellect and knowledge to think of some really great ways that both of you can utilize your finances together as a team!
It’s time to get the money talking with your partner. Go team!
